


Handle With Care

by InkgooSupernova



Series: The Winter System [33]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Babysitting, Bed-Wetting, Bucky Barnes Has Nightmares, Bucky Barnes Has Panic Attacks, Bucky Barnes has DID - Dissociative Identity Disorder, Chronic Pain, Daddy Sam Wilson, Diapers, Dinner, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Domestic Avengers, Embarrassment, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kid Bucky Barnes, Kid Fic, Other, Pepper Potts Is a Good Bro, Physical Disability, Punching Nazis, Second-Hand Embarrassment, Unreliable Narrator, Wetting, daddy Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:07:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24829561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkgooSupernova/pseuds/InkgooSupernova
Summary: Level three missions meant that both Daddy and Papa had to go, leaving him babysat by whoever wasn't going, which was usually Ms. Pepper. Normally, days spent with Ms. Pepper weren'tsobad. She would play games with him and let him color and didn't make fun of him when he couldn't count past fourteen or spell words bigger than five letters. They always preferred being with Daddy and Papa, but Ms. Pepper was a good babysitter.But that day was the kind of day where heneededhis guardians. He didn'twantanyone else.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson
Series: The Winter System [33]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693231
Comments: 36
Kudos: 111





	1. Please Don't Go

Jamesy whimpered as the dull, stabbing pain shot though his flesh arm.

"You doing alright?" Papa asked, his voice soft.

He nodded, though not nearly as convincing as he hoped.

It was just one of those days.

The serum that Hydra had put in their bodies had some side effects that were less than desirable, to say the least. One of which being the chronic back and joint pain, on top of the pain of the port dug deep into their left shoulder. The weight of the metal arm never helped the pain in their spine, though Hydra never cared too much for their body's comfort.

Most days were better, with the pain mostly manageable. They could even completely ignore the pain on the good days.

Though some days, such as that day, the pain was much less manageable. Something about the air pressure of a coming storm coupled with the Soldier's strenuous activities in the tower's gym the day before left their body aching something terrible.

Jamesy couldn't handle their metal arm that day, the added weight of the machine pulling on the connecting port in their shoulder proved far too much for his aching bones. For that day, he was sans arm and couch-bound.

"Here, lamb," Daddy piped up, handing the little boy a sippy cup full of water. "Drink this."

Jamesy took the cup, wincing a little at the pain in his wrist and elbow and shoulder, and gulped down the cool water inside. Once he was finished, he handed his Daddy the cup, letting his arm rest against the couch once again. It felt as if every single joint in his arm, even all of the little knuckle joints and tiny carpal bones in his wrist, were full of coarse sand. It was just his luck that it was a right arm day _and_ a left leg day. The pain was always in a random limb, sometimes even in more than one, always feeling as if every single joint was grinding together. He wished they could just open up their limbs, take apart the joints like a ball-jointed doll, and clean out the sand grinding against their bones like they could for the plates in their arm.

Since they were unable to do such things, he chose instead to take it easy, relying heavily on his Daddy and Papa for help.

That was, until Daddy's phone rang. Jamesy could tell the sharp, pulsating ringtone anywhere.

It was the emergency line.

Daddy spoke on the phone for a few seconds before hanging up, already gathering his uniform and shield from their respective places. "Sam, duty calls, level three."

"You've gotta be kidding me." Papa huffed, carefully standing up from the couch as to not jostle the pained little boy. "Jamesy, we're gonna go get Ms. Pepper, okay? She's gonna stay with you until we get back."

Jamesy _hated_ level three missions. Level three missions meant that the threat needed both Avengers Team A _and_ Avengers Team B. Daddy was on Team A with Tony and Natasha and Clint and Bruce, and Papa was on Team B with Wanda and Vision and Rhodey and Peter. They were on a team too, though they were on Team C along with T'Challa and a few others that would only be called for big, big, _big_ emergencies. Those were very rare, but the Soldier liked going on them because he enjoyed being useful, even if Daddy and Papa and the therapists had told him to not think of it as 'being useful'.

Level three missions meant that both Daddy and Papa had to go, leaving him babysat by whoever wasn't going, which was usually Ms. Pepper. Normally, days spent with Ms. Pepper weren't _so_ bad. She would play games with him and let him color and didn't make fun of him when he couldn't count past fourteen or spell words bigger than five letters. They always preferred being with Daddy and Papa, but Ms. Pepper was a good babysitter.

But that day was the kind of day where he _needed_ his guardians. He didn't _want_ anyone else.

However, he had no choice. He had to suck it up and be brave, no matter how hurt or scared he was. He couldn't make Daddy and Papa stay and run the risk of the bad guys hurting the rest of the Avengers and taking over the world. He couldn't live with himself if he did and something bad happened.

"Kay..." He sighed, hissing against the sudden jolt of pain in his back.

"It's gonna be okay, we'll be back as soon as we can." Papa hummed, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead before rushing off to their room to gather his gear. Daddy followed suit, planting another kiss to his head before slipping on his big tactical boots. Right on cue, as if scripted, there was a knock at the door.

"Wilson? Rogers?" Ms. Pepper's voice rang through, muffled by the door.

"Right on time, Potts." Papa held open the door, already dressed in his harness and gear, his robotic wings folded neatly against his back. "Jamesy's having a few joint problems today, so he's probably not going to want to do much. Just keep him comfy and don't let him get up to do anything by himself." Papa explained, slipping his red and grey goggles over his head. "You know the drill."

"Thank you so much, Pepper," Daddy nearly whimpered, snapping the straps of his cowl under his chin. "We're sorry for the short notice."

"It's no problem at all, short notices are an occupational hazard." Pepper hummed. "Stay safe out there, don't let Tony get in any trouble."

"Can't promise that." Papa laughed. "Bye Jamesy, we'll be back soon, we love you."

With that, Daddy and Papa rushed out the door, leaving Jamesy alone with Ms. Pepper.


	2. A Watchful Eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamesy sighed, rolling his flesh wrist in a pitiful attempt to ease the grinding pain. He tried to use his left hand to hold the wrist in place, when the lack of movement reminded him that it was currently in the other room resting on his bed. He sighed again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features incontinence/wetting.
> 
> Reader Discretion is Advised.

"Have you eaten yet? Would you like anything?" Ms. Pepper's voice rang out softly from the kitchen.

Jamesy hadn't moved from his spot, already missing his Daddy and Papa so dearly. What was the mission? Were they going to get hurt? What if the Quinjet crashed? What if the bad guys were going to kill them?

He was stuck with those awful, painful thoughts on top of the awful, painful feelings in his arm and leg and back.

Why did there have to be a level three mission _that_ day?

"Jamesy? Did you hear me?" Ms. Pepper's voice was a bit louder this time, now standing beside him and carefully moving into his field of vision. He hadn't realized she asked him a question.

"Huh?" He looked up, already wincing at the tug of pain in his neck and shoulder.

"Have you eaten today? Are you hungry?" Ms. Pepper asked again, seemingly not annoyed or angry that he accidentally ignored her the first time.

The therapists called it an 'auditory processing disorder', and that they weren't ignoring or misunderstanding people on purpose. That didn't make any of them feel any less bad when they didn't hear someone, however.

"Uhm, d'nno..." He mumbled. His tummy was too tangled in knots at the thought of Daddy and Papa getting hurt, on top of the pain in his joints that ate up all of his attention.

"Well, I know you aren't feeling to well," Ms. Pepper began, her voice clear and thoughtful. "So how about something light for lunch, just to keep you from feeling any worse, okay? I can make you some soup and toast if you'd like, or some macaroni and cheese."

Jamesy _really_ didn't want anything warm, he didn't want to run the risk of dropping it on himself and burning himself. Or worse, accidentally dropping it on Ms. Pepper and hurting her. He shook his head in response. "Som'thin' cold, pl'ees?"

"Of course, how about some fruits and veggies to snack on then?" Ms. Pepper asked, earning a nod from the little boy. "Alright, I'll get those ready for you."

Jamesy sighed, rolling his flesh wrist in a pitiful attempt to ease the grinding pain. He tried to use his left hand to hold the wrist in place, when the lack of movement reminded him that it was currently in the other room resting on his bed. He sighed again.

"Are you alright, dear?" Ms. Pepper asked from the kitchen where she was currently cutting up apples and carrots and who knows what else.

"'M fine." Jamesy mumbled, letting his remaining arm rest against the couch once more. He wished he had thought to turn the TV on before Daddy and Papa left, since he couldn't do it himself and he really, _really_ didn't want to interrupt Ms. Pepper to ask for help.

"Here you go." Ms. Pepper hummed as she set a divided plate full of apple and carrot slices, along with a few grapes, on his lap. He was grateful for that, since he couldn't lean forward enough to even reach the coffee table in front of him. "Is there anything you want or need right now?"

"Uhm..." He thought for a moment. "Can y'u help me turn th' TV on?" He asked, trying and failing to point with his flesh arm. "Th' remote's on th' table."

"Hm, here, I have an idea." Ms. Pepper smiled at him before looking up towards the ceiling. "Jarvis? Could you turn on the TV, please?"

"Certainly, Miss Potts," The robotic voice responded. "Is there anything specific you would like to watch?"

Jamesy felt like an idiot and a half, why didn't _he_ think to ask JARVIS? If he could move his arm enough to smack himself on the forehead in that moment, he would. "Uhm, Bluey pl'ees."

With that, the TV came to life, the familiar orchestral theme song of the cartoon echoing through the speakers at a pleasant volume. Jamesy let himself relax a little, leaning back into the couch as he carefully lifted his food to his mouth. He could handle those small movements in that moment, which he was grateful for. He felt like he would die of embarrassment if Ms. Pepper had to hand feed him. Bucky would probably kill him if he even _asked_.

By the time the second episode had ended, Jamesy had cleaned his plate. He was eating much slower than usual, his arm hurting more and more with each little movement. He could barely move the nearly useless appendage by the time he got to his last apple slice. Thankfully, Ms. Pepper offered to take the plate to the kitchen for him, which he gratefully agreed to, as he only had the strength left to lift the plate off of his lap to hand it to her.

Unfortunately, the cheerful, brightly colored cartoon couldn't distract him from the ache in his bones, nor the ache in his chest. His brain quickly resumed its slideshow presentation of 'Every Single Possible Way Daddy and Papa Could Get Hurt'. Jamesy couldn't help the whimpers that escaped him as the thought of Daddy and Papa crashing or getting shot and killed invaded his mind.

"Here, do you think this might help?" Ms. Pepper was suddenly beside him once again, handing him an item that was wrapped in a towel. "It's an ice pack, it might help the pain."

Jamesy was a little apprehensive at the thought of putting something cold on his already pained body, but he didn't want to make Ms. Pepper feel bad or like he didn't appreciate her help, so he let her rest the towel on top of his aching wrist. He had to admit, after a few minutes of waiting for the cold to seep though the fabric, his wrist did feel _slightly_ better.

"Miss Pepper?" Jamesy piped up, already a little embarrassed to even need to ask for help. "Coul' y'u get Winnie pl'ees?"

"Of course, Sweetpea." She hummed, standing up from where she was sitting in the chair adjacent to him and walking to his room. She had watched over them all enough times to know who Winnie was and where the plush of him usually sat in their room. She returned not a minute later with the bear cradled in her arms, setting the soft plush in the crook of his arm.

The rest of the afternoon was fairly uneventful, with Jamesy binge watching episode after episode of his Australian dog cartoon and Ms. Pepper checking up on him every once in a while, asking if he was alright and if he needed anything, which were all met with adamant 'No's.

Until Bingo mentioned from the screen how badly she needed to wee, which inadvertently reminded him of the familiar, urgent pressure in his bladder, followed by his body's standard reaction of relieving himself into the protective padding between his legs.

He could feel the blood rushing to his face, silently praying that Ms. Pepper didn't hear the quiet rush of liquid or see the beet red color his face had taken on. If she _did_ hear him, she didn't acknowledge it, her eyes glued intently to the screen. He tried desperately not to think about the now warm and unpleasant squish between his legs, attempting to will away the blood from his cheeks. He could ignore the uncomfortable feeling until Daddy and Papa got home.

Or so he thought.


	3. Occupational Hazard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Are you two seriously talking about parenting in the middle of a battle?" Tony's voice crackled through the transmitter, said man flying overhead and firing a repulsor blast towards another enemy. "Can't even get your mind off your kid while taking out Nazis?"

"Should we call?" Steve asked, skillfully catching his shield as it flew back towards him.

"Pepper's watched him a few times, they're fine." Sam responded, tapping at the screen on his wrist, piloting Redwing to follow a straggler on the run while he tailed a few more troops from the air.

"I just don't want to leave-" Steve cut himself off as he lifted his shield, blocking enemy fire before hurling his shield towards the perpetrator. "-Jamesy without an update. What if Pepper needs help?"

"Are you two seriously talking about parenting in the middle of a battle?" Tony's voice crackled through the transmitter, said man flying overhead and firing a repulsor blast towards another enemy. "Can't even get your mind off your kid while taking out Nazis?"

Sam laughed a little at the sound of his boyfriend grumbling into the communicator. He couldn't help it, hearing how protective Steve was over their little boy, it was honestly heart warming. He didn't let that distract him, however, as he swooped down to take out another troop with his wing. "Steve's a good dad, gotta give him that."

"I've heard the little tyke talk about you too, Wilson." Clint's voice crackled through. "I think you're both good dads, at least from what I've seen."

"Thanks, Barton." Sam hummed, launching himself into the sky to get his bearings on how many more enemies there were left to take out.

"All clear over here, anything on the ground?" Rhodey called from the west side of the field.

"Got all of them down here." Natasha's voice crackled through. "Wilson?"

"All clear here, looks like we're golden." Sam called back, swooping down into a soft landing.

"We'd better do a parameter sweep, just to be sure. Don't want to leave anyone to get through." Steve suggested.

"you sure about that, Cap? Don't you wanna get back home before bedtime? Heard kids are _terrible_ with babysitters and bedtime." Tony teased, earning a glare worth a thousand words from Captain America himself.

"Stark." Steve growled, already on edge from having to leave Jamesy at home in pain at all. Sure, they both trusted Pepper to keep him company, but Steve and Sam would both rather be there for him instead.

"C'mon, the faster we sweep the faster we can get dinner, I'm _starving_." Clint whined, already walking off to sweep the area.

Lucky for them, the area was clear of all Hydra troops, and they were cleared to head back to the Quinjet and to Headquarters for debriefing. Sam had to admit, he was pretty hungry from all of the fighting, so he could use a dinner with Steve to decompress before going home. Jamesy wouldn't be very comfortable if he and Steve came home all high strung and battle worn, and that wouldn't help anyone.

"Hey, Steve," Sam piped up as the two sat in the Quinjet on the way to HQ. "You wanna get some dinner after we get out?"

"Sam, Jamesy's waiting." Steve was in a foul mood, Sam could practically see his energy radiating off of him.

"Yeah, he is, but I'm sure he wouldn't want to see you all stressed out like this. Some food and time to calm down will do him more good than anything." Sam countered. By the way Steve's shoulders curved in on themselves, Sam could tell he had won.

"...As long as we call him, okay?" Steve finally agreed. Sam was already pulling out his phone.

A dinner date wouldn't hurt anyone.


	4. Lying Is A Manipulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That's good, have you gone to the potty at all?" Daddy asked, causing Jamesy's blood to run cold.

It had been four hours.

At that point, Jamesy had already wet himself twice, and the uncomfortable squish of his padding had become sodden and unbearable. But he was far too embarrassed to ask Ms. Pepper for help, no matter how uncomfortable he was. Ms. Pepper had even asked if he needed to go to the bathroom a few times, but every time he denied, which he knew was a fib and that he would get in so much trouble if she found out he had lied, but he really, really, _really_ didn't want to deal with the humiliation of her having to help him with something so _shameful_. So there he sat in his own soaked padding.

At the very least, he was lucky he didn't have to do anything _else_ in the bathroom.

He was startled at the sudden buzzing of a cellphone.

"Oh, look, it's Daddy," Ms. Pepper chirped, holding up the phone for him to see. He swallowed hard, trying so very hard to not be suspicious. "Hey there, Rogers, how did it go?"

Jamesy sat in silence, staring at the TV as '101 Dalmatians' played. The parts where Pongo and Perdita fought Jasper and Horrace scared him a little, but Ms. Pepper reminded him it was just like what Daddy and Papa were doing on their mission, which made him feel a little less scared.

"Here, do you think you could hold the phone with your shoulder, Jamesy?" Ms. Pepper asked, helping him to prop the phone between his armless shoulder and his ear.

"Hi." Jamesy didn't mean to sound so tense, he hoped Daddy would take it as being in pain.

"Hey, lamb, how are you feeling?" Daddy's voice rang through the phone, which made Jamesy feel so much better, no matter how bad his joints hurt or how unbearably itchy and wet he felt.

"'M okay, Miss Pepper 's lettin' m' watch TV." Jamesy explained, watching as Pongo and Perdita led the ninety-nine dalmatian puppies through the snow and into the milking barn.

"That's good, have you gone to the potty at all?" Daddy asked, causing Jamesy's blood to run cold.

"Uhm, yes." Jamesy was in _so much trouble_. If Daddy found out he had fibbed to him over something so important, there was no way he _wouldn't_ get beat. Sure, Daddy and Papa had never hit him before, and they always promised they wouldn't, but that didn't mean they never would, especially for something as awful as _that_. But he couldn't ask Ms. Pepper for help getting changed, he just _couldn't_.

"That's good." Daddy hummed. Jamesy could hear some other voices in the background, which sounded a bit like laughter, which probably meant the rest of the Avengers heard Daddy ask him about something so personal and embarrassing. He could feel worms squirming and crawling underneath his skin.

 _Shame_.

"Well, Papa and I are going to get some dinner after debriefing, so we'll be home just a little after your bedtime. Miss Pepper is going to help you get ready for bed, I'm sure she remembers where your night-time pullups are-"

"Kay." Jamesy snapped. He was _so_ going to get it when Daddy and Papa got home. He could only _imagine_ how bad a spanking would hurt on top of his back and joint pain _and_ the rash that was surely forming on his bottom and between his legs.

"Are you alright, Jamesy? Still hurting?" Daddy must have thought the snap was from his pain. Not only was he fibbing, but he was being manipulative by making Daddy think he was snapping from his pain. He was in so, so, _so_ much trouble.

"'M sorry..." Jamesy whimpered, hoping he didn't hurt Daddy's feelings as to avoid an even _worse_ punishment.

"Are you okay? Do you need us to come home now? We can if-"

"Uh uh, 's okay." Jamesy was being the worst little boy in history.

"Alright, well, make sure to get some help from Miss Pepper when you get ready for bed, okay?" Daddy didn't sound very sure, but continued anyways. "We'll be back soon, Papa and I both love you very much. Goodnight, Jamesy."

Jamesy let Ms. Pepper take the phone from him after Daddy hung up.

"Here, how about we get you some dinner too?" Ms. Pepper offered.

Jamesy couldn't shake the sick feeling in his tummy.


	5. Come Here Often?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve was about to argue back, but the growl in his stomach stopped him dead in his tracks. "Alright, but can we at least make it a little quick? I feel bad leaving him alone."

"Steve, he's fine, you're working yourself up over nothing." Sam sighed, taking his boyfriend's hand into his own across the table.

"I know, I know," Steve sighed, squeezing his hand. "He just sounded really tense, I'm worried he's really hurting."

"Potts' there to keep an eye on him, and we're less than an hour away, it's going to be fine." Sam countered.

Steve was about to argue back, but the growl in his stomach stopped him dead in his tracks. "Alright, but can we at least make it a little quick? I feel bad leaving him alone."

"Steve, he isn't alone. Potts is a good woman, she's more than qualified to keep him safe and comfortable." Sam knew getting Steve to stop worrying about the Winter System was harder than pulling teeth, but he was determined to get him to relax at least a little. "We'll be back soon enough, it's going to be fine."

Steve finally leaned back in his seat, resigning to the fact that he was going to relax whether he liked it or not. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." Sam smiled, rubbing Steve's knuckles with his thumb. "Anything sound good so far?"

"Kinda torn, what sounds good to you?" Steve hummed.

The night was surprisingly enjoyable once Steve managed to relax a little. The two men took their time balancing generic, movie quality flirting over the table and actually ordering and eating their food.

"That looks good." Sam hummed, eyeballing Steve's plate of gnocchi in vodka sauce.

"Wanna try some?" Steve held up his fork.

"Don't mind if I do~" Sam practically purred, opening his mouth and letting the other slip the pasta into his mouth. "Mmh, I was right, that _is_ good."

"Yeah, you can tell they made this sauce in house, I- oh, here." Steve leaned over the table, gently licking away a small drop of sauce from his lips. Sam couldn't help the blush that burned its way across his cheeks.

"You really know how to spoil a guy." Sam chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to the other man's lips. "We really ought'a bring Bucky here at some point. He'd probably love this place."

"Spoil both of my best men at once? That's one offer I don't think I can refuse." Steve hummed in thought. "Haven't been on a proper date with either of you in quite a while, maybe a night to dinner and a dance?"

"That would be _amazing_. Gotta ask Buck next time he's out." Sam nodded in agreement, already excited at the prospect. "Though, it _is_ getting kinda late, we'd better head home and let Potts off babysitting duty."

After a few more minutes of relaxing in each other's energy, followed by paying the bill and tipping their waitress, the two made their way back home with the help of an Uber, as they both forgot that the Quinjet dropped them off and they hadn't brought the Jeep.

Sam could barely keep himself off of Steve's side as the two of them rode the elevator up to their floor. Honestly, if it wasn't for the fact that the two of them had a hurting kid waiting for them in their apartment, they would probably be necking in the elevator in preparation for an even more exciting end to their unplanned post-battle date night.

That didn't stop Sam from holding his boyfriend's hand the whole way to their floor.

That is, until they walked into the sight of Jamesy sobbing into Pepper's shoulder on the floor, surrounded by shredded couch cushions and plastic shards.

What the hell _happened?_


	6. Downward Spiral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Kay." Jamesy tried to sound as normal as he could, wishing he had the Soldier's ability to mask his pain so perfectly. The Soldier could lie straight to Daddy and Papa's faces about how bad something hurt, but he could barely manage to not scream at just a little itch and a little ache.
> 
> It didn't _feel_ like just a little itch an a little ache, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features wetting, brief references to past sexual abuse, and second-hand embarrassment.
> 
> Reader Discretion is Advised.

"Here, Jamesy, it's just about bedtime." Ms. Pepper hummed. "Lets get you ready for bed."

Jamesy had been suffering through his dinner, trying desperately to ignore the unbearable itch that was starting to drive him up the wall. He could barely focus on lifting the pieces of sandwich to his mouth with the combination of itching and aching assaulting all of his senses. He barely made it though his sandwich, biting down every pained whimper. He had told yet _another_ fib when he convinced Ms. Pepper that his joints stopped hurting and that he was fine. She had told him she would still stay until Daddy and Papa got home just in case.

"Kay." Jamesy tried to sound as normal as he could, wishing he had the Soldier's ability to mask his pain so perfectly. The Soldier could lie straight to Daddy and Papa's faces about how bad something hurt, but he could barely manage to not scream at just a little itch and a little ache.

It didn't _feel_ like just a little itch an a little ache, though.

With that, he made his way to the bathroom. Even the ten feet walk- er, waddle- to the bathroom felt like H-E-Double Hockey Sticks on his pained leg, especially while trying to walk evenly instead of limping.

"Do you need any help? Your Daddy said you might need help getting into your-"

"'M fine." Jamesy was in for the spanking of a lifetime with how many times he had snapped and lied that day, and he _knew it_. "Thank y'u." Hopefully that would soften the blow. With that, he slipped into the bathroom, allowing himself to finally rest on the closed toilet seat. He wasn't sure which was worse: the burning needles stabbing into his privates, the cold squish of the soaked padding underneath him, or the aching grind of his bones. He just wanted it all to go away. He knew he couldn't handle getting into a fresh pullup on his own, let alone hiding the one currently wrapped in a vice grip around him.

He had to suck it up. He just had to make it to bed, then Daddy and Papa would be home, then he would be safe.

Then he would have to lie to them too, and hide the rash that had most definitely formed on his skin, and hide the way his joints still hurt. Maybe _then_ they wouldn't find out about all the bad things he had done and beat him into a pulp and toss him to the curb for the garbage truck to take away.

He could already feel his sandwich trying to make its way back up his throat.

He felt so _ashamed_.

He stood up from the toilet, propping himself on his flesh arm on the counter, biting back the pained squeal of pressure against his aching bones. He had to at _least_ brush his teeth. If he couldn't manage that, then Ms. Pepper would try to help him and would _know_ that he had fibbed. Then she would tell Daddy and Papa and they would all be so disappointed in him.

He forced himself to stand on his non-aching leg, trying desperately to balance himself while juggling the painful assault to his very being. He managed to get his toothbrush, set it on the counter, squeeze the toothpaste onto the bristles, and lift the brush to his mouth. He forced back the tears of pain that sprung to his eyes as he worked to scrub at the inside of his mouth. Maybe if he brushed hard enough, he would forget about the awful pain in his everywhere.

He ignored the spike of fear in his chest when he saw blood in his spit, rinsing away the evidence of his wrong-doings. Once he rinsed his mouth of the minty foam, he bulked up his courage, puffed up his chest, and walked back out of the bathroom.

Luckily, he had been in his pajamas all day, so he wouldn't have to change. He took his chance to quickly slip into bed, shrugging away any other possible attempt to be helped.

"Are you comfy? Do you want any more blankets?" Ms. Pepper asked, and Jamesy felt so _awful_ for lying to her so much.

"Uhm, maybe jus' one more, pl'ees." He had to tell the truth at least once. He watched as Ms. Pepper walked out of the room towards the linen closet. He took that moment of privacy to desperately scratch at the unbearable itch through his soaked padding, which was honestly about as useful as trying to wash your hair with boxing gloves on. He quickly stopped his movements when he heard the footsteps heading back towards his room. He sighed as Ms. Pepper laid the extra blanket over him, adding just a little extra weight over his aching body.

"Well, I'll be out in the living room if you need me." Ms. Pepper explained. "Your Daddy and Papa will be home in a couple hours, then they'll come in and cuddle with you."

Jamesy swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. Daddy would _definitely_ be able to tell his padding was far too soaked to be recently changed if he cuddled him. He would probably rip the disgusting thing off of him and pull him over his knee right then and there, in front of _everyone_.

"Well, goodnight, Jamesy. I had fun spending time with you today, even if it wasn't exactly ideal." Ms. Pepper smiled as she walked out of the room, and he couldn't help the awful feeling in his tummy that told him he had done something horribly wrong.

He felt like he needed to kneel at the side of his bed and pray to be forgiven. The Soldier said no god listened to them any more.

He tried to stop thinking about it, instead laying flat on his back and closing his eyes. Sure, he _hated_ sleeping on his back, _especially_ when his back and limbs were hurting, but Daddy and Papa couldn't feel how sodden he was if he was laying like that.

He just had to ignore the awful, persistent itching.

Jamesy hadn't managed to fall asleep, although the world around him felt as if it was made of jello. He bit back a yelp as the door to his room swung open violently, revealing Daddy's fuzzy silhouette.

"Jamesy. You lied to me." Daddy's booming voice sounded so very _angry_. He tried to squirm out of his bed, but the blankets covering him were weighing him down.

"----" He tried to scream out for help, but all that came out was a hiss of breathless air. He struggled harder and harder against his blankets as Daddy stomped closer and closer, soon towering over him.

"You lied." Daddy growled like a wolf, leaning closer and closer to his face. His eyes were far too big and bulging out of his head, his mouth far too wide and unnatural, his lips moving as if they were being pulled by strings. His head began to squirm and stretch unnaturally, as if it was clay being molded between fingers.

" **YOU _LIED_** " Daddy's voice roared like thunder as his hand, large and calloused and unforgiving, shot out from his side and gripped his tiny neck.

Jamesy shot up in his bed with a terrified shriek

The sheets were soaked straight through to the top blanket that Ms. Pepper had given him. He had wet himself and his oversoaked padding had finally given out, now a shredded pile of mush inside of his ruined pajama pants.

As it turned out, he _had_ managed to fall asleep. Deeply enough to have a horrible nightmare reminding him of his sins.

"Jamesy? Are you okay?" Ms. Pepper stepped through the door.

The last thing he remembered, he was bolting from the bed, shoving poor Ms. Pepper to the side in order to escape his foreseeable punishment for ruining _everything_.

The next thing he knew, there was couch stuffing filling his mouth, a crushed sippy cup in his hand, fresh sick covering the front of his pajama shirt, and the worst ache he had ever felt in his life tearing its way through every single joint in his body.

He couldn't help the way his body crumpled on the floor, the weight of his guilt crushing his little body.

He couldn't even fight against Ms. Pepper's arms wrapping around him, pulling him into a gentle hug. He couldn't help soaking up the soft whispers of comfort that were being pressed into the crown of his head.

He knew he didn't deserve such gentle kindness after everything he had done.

"'M bad 'm sorry I did so bad 'm sorry _'m sorry_." Jamesy babbled out through his hiccuping sobs.

"Jamesy, sweetpea, no." Ms. Pepper tried to reassure him, which only earned more pained sobs. "It was just an accident, it happens."

Jamesy shook his head. "No, no, I _lied_ , I did _bad_ an' an' Daddy's gonna _kill me!_ I did _bad!_ " He sobbed out, far too upset to even care about the awful mess of snot and sweat and puke and tears he was leaving on Ms. Pepper's nice shirt.

Just his luck, he could hear the door to the apartment open.

"What the hell _happened?_ " Daddy's voice gasped softly.

" _I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I LIED PL'EES DON'T HURT M' I'M SORRY DADDY 'M SORRY!_ " Jamesy's voice cracked straight up five octaves in his panicked sobs. " _I DI'N' MEAN T' B' BAD 'M SORRY PL'EES DON'T KILL ME I'LL BE GOOD I PROMISE!_ "

"Woah, woah, Jamesy, calm down!" Papa was already at his side, rubbing those soft, soothing circles into his back that he very much didn't deserve. "It's okay, it's okay, just calm down. No one's gonna hurt you."

"Can you tell us what happened? Why are you so upset?" Daddy knelt down next to Papa, though a little farther back. He could probably smell the awful scent of his shameful display from the door and didn't want to get any closer. It served him right.

"I-I lied 'bout goin' potty caus' caus' I was 'mbarrassed an' I lied 'bout m' arm an' leg an' back not hurtin' anymor' caus' I di'n' wanna get 'n trouble f-for lyin' th' firs' time an' an' I lied 'bout needin' help an' now ev'rythin's itchy an hur's an' I had'd a bad dream tha' Daddy knew I was bad an was g'unna _kill me!_ " Jamesy managed to hiccup out between sobs, all the while trembling in Ms. Pepper's arms.

Daddy looked so pale.

"Jamesy, I'm so sorry you felt that way, I didn't know you felt so bad." Ms. Pepper sounded very hurt and upset, and that made Jamesy feel like the worst excuse of a little boy _ever_.

"Here, how about I help you get cleaned up, then we'll all sit down and work this out together, okay?" Papa offered. "You aren't in any trouble, and no one's going to hurt you, I promise."

Jamesy was far too tired and in far too much pain and guilt to refuse, letting Papa wrap his flesh arm over his shoulder and help him hobble to the bathroom.

The time spent in the bathroom was a bit of an emotional blur, filled mostly with tiny, hiccuping sobs from the aftershock of Jamesy's panic attack meltdown hybrid while Papa helped him get undressed and clean off the mushy, shredded remains of the destroyed padding that stuck to his angry, red, patchy skin. Once he was cleaned up and dried, Papa helped him to rub some kind of cream into his skin, which sent awful shivers down his spine at the memory of his old Daddy rubbing stuff on his private parts. The only thing that really kept him from tumbling over the edge was Papa's soothing voice, telling him how brave he was being and how everything was going to be okay, that he was safe.

He didn't feel like _any_ of those things were true.

Papa left him alone in the bathroom for only a moment after he helped him into a new pullup, returning with a fresh change of pajamas, which he was also helped into. Once that was all taken care of, and Jamesy had finally came down from his post-nightmare adrenaline rush, the two of them made their way back out to the living room, where Daddy and Ms. Pepper were waiting. The living room was already cleaned up, with the couch missing a cushion. Jamesy couldn't help the shameful hunch in his shoulders.

"Jamesy, I understand that you were very scared, no one is angry at you or upset with you." Papa began, rubbing those soothing circles into his aching back. "Today was a very stressful day, huh?"

Jamesy nodded, keeping his head tucked down.

"Do you want to explain what happened, from the beginning?" Daddy asked, his voice as soft as humanly possible. Despite that, Jamesy still couldn't help the sudden flinch that shook his body.

"Uhm, I kin'a, uhm," Jamesy began. "I sorta wet m'self bu'h I didn't want Miss Pepper seein' caus' I felt bad e'noff tha' she had t' help m' eat an' turn th' TV on an' stuff an' it was 'mbarrassin', an' I lied an tol' her I wasn' hurtin' anymore caus' I didn't wan' her findin' out I lied th' firs' time, an' then I lied 'bout needin' help gettin' into a new pullup caus' it was ev'n _more_ 'mbarrassin' _an'_ she wou'l've found out I lied th' firs' time, then I had a r'eely bad dream tha' Daddy knew I lied an was yellin' a' me an'-an' grabbed m' neck an' was gonna kill me an' I panicked an' acciden'ly..." He vaguely gestured the best he could to the living room floor.

"I see, you told one fib about something important because you felt bad about it, and it snowballed out of control?" Papa explained, earning a nod from the exhausted little boy.

"I'm sorry you felt too embarrassed to tell me you needed help with that," Ms. Pepper added. "I didn't want you feeling bad or getting hurt, but I understand that things like that are pretty personal, I get why that would be embarrassing."

"But you _did_ still lie about something very important, something about your health, and now you have an awful rash to show for it." Papa added, not sounding mean or like he was making fun of him. "You know how important it is to tell the truth about your health."

Jamesy nodded. He knew _very well_ how important it was now. "'M sorry Miss Pepper, I di'n' mean t' make y'u feel bad or make y'u take care of me bad, I jus' felt bad an' scared an' ashamed. Bu'h now I feel ev'n _more_ of all of those caus' I wasn' hones' 'n th' firs' place..." He sighed, leaning into his Papa's side.

"I'm sorry I didn't think about how something like that would make you feel, we should've had something in place for that." Daddy mumbled, himself looking guilty and ashamed, which made Jamesy feel even _worse_.

"Hey, now we know." Papa piped up. "The only thing we can do now is move forward so this doesn't happen again. And Jamesy," He twisted to look down at the little boy. "I know you feel bad, and that you're going to be punished, but as I said, you aren't in any trouble. You made a mistake, and you learned your lesson the hard way. We all still love you no matter what."

Jamesy sniffled a little before doing his best to hug his Papa with his aching flesh arm. Papa hugged him back, followed by Daddy and Ms. Pepper. He already felt a _lot_ better being held by his guardians.

"It's pretty late, why don't we head to bed?" Daddy offered, easily lifting Jamesy up when he clung to his neck.

After a few more hugs and quite a few 'thank you's to Ms. Pepper (whom Jamesy promised he would buy a gift for as reparations for his behavior, no matter how much she insisted he didn't have to), the three made their way to the bedroom, where Daddy and Papa quickly changed into their sleep wear before snuggling into bed with their tired little boy.

Tomorrow, they would have a _lot_ of back up plans to set up for the next level three mission emergency.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This last chapter ended up reading out like a children's book explaining the dangers of telling fibs.
> 
> Remember kids, it's always important to tell the truth about your health and how you are feeling. The people who care for you can't help you if they don't know how you're really feeling.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> In this story, Jamesy has to deal with a chronic pain flare-up day, which all goes down hill after Daddy and Papa have to leave for an Avengers mission, leaving him with Pepper for the day.
> 
> Any behaviors related to DID or Autism Spectrum Neurodivergency within this story are based on **personal experiences** and are not a scientific basis or professional explanation for either DID systems or Autism Spectrum Neurodivergency. No two people, let alone no two systems, are exactly the same.
> 
> Kudos and Comments are always appreciated!


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